Monday, January 30, 2012
The Squeeze and I went back to work today and if I can’t say I actually looked forward to, I at least enjoyed the “routine” of it all.
Routine will need to control us this week as we step back into our “no alcohol/no fat/boxing” lifestyle; and let’s face it, our week away was an alcoholic carnivore’s dream. Any progress made the week before was set back by weeks which I have never quite understood. Why is it that a single week of food/wine debauchery, takes about three weeks to rectify! Who the hell thought that one up?
Anyhow, last night when the Squeeze got back from hillbilly heaven; and as expected, we had a conversation regarding the stressful week’s holiday, the kid and how we combat this particular issue. And trust me, it needs combating, because we are not going to make it if we can’t manage to figure out some work arounds. Separate holidays is not the answer, although the most favourable solution at this time.
And let’s face it; there are several major issues; all converging at the one time; so many personalities and interests working against the other. How on earth do we muddle through and come out on the other side as a working ‘family’ unit?
I mean, I can work around most of the issues regarding the Squeeze. I already knew that he was basically lazy and totally disorganised; even better, he knows I know it. We’ve talked about it millions of times (which I think means I’ve talked; he has ignored or just nodded…) But now we have moved into the ‘one year living together’ thing and the absolute miserly amount of romance I was receiving in the early days has totally diminished. We are talking down to zilch. Zip.
I tell him things or send him things and he sends them back to me a few days later; infuriatingly proud as punch about his find! Idiot. Still; I can mostly handle this right alongside the lack of romance, because it is expected - but there remains to be seen some evolution into manning up and removing the Harridan’s self ordained ‘keeper of the knowledge and guardian of all that is right’.
Jury is out on how he will handle the “we need to discuss uniforms and books” comment from yesterday’s drop off. Not that it wasn’t expected; she is nothing if not predictable when talking money.
My suggestion was for a resend of the maintenance agreement where it stated quite clearly that uniforms and books would come out of maintenance. Astounding how quickly she forgets any agreements that do not work to her benefit… And sorry, but if you agreed to it, maybe you should have purchased said books and uniforms before you bugger off across the country for Christmas and then for an overseas holiday.
But the kid..? Now there is a delicate issue and a road fraught with danger. I myself wore the opposite shoe when my children were young and it’s tough, I know that. Made tougher I suspect because the Harridan is so unreasonable with her demands and the Squeeze just wants to Moodle up for peace and quiet. Hell, I wouldn’t know how to Moodle up if my life depended on it. Instead, I want to grab a sword and go Joan of Arc.
And when all is said and done, there has to be some measure of fairness here; it can’t always be my corner that must suffer and bend; for it is my life, home and relationship also. It can’t just be me that ‘negotiates’; and maybe it is time for the Squeeze to see the reality of life and understand that there is quite a lot of negotiation on my part and not much coming back; and some things that I can’t negotiate on and nor should I – for they are detrimental to this kid growing up and becoming anything even remotely sustainable as a human!
Posted by Mistress at 4:02 PM