Tuesday, August 2, 2016

I'm Wilder than I Thought!

Yesterday I mentioned that my mood is a straight line; well with a tiny wave of curves just for fun.  I said that my personality is a straight line, instead of wildly careening from high to low.

Now I'm not so sure that is as described...

My mood is not lurching from 'fantastic' to 'doom and gloom' in one swing of the pendulum...

But it is slowly building...  Ie: instead of seconds at 'full tilt' and then seconds at 'doom and gloom', now I have a full day.  Oh no!  A full day of feeling okay (which was not at the level of 'fantastic' I had before!!) and a full day of feeling tired of the world (come to think on it; that isn't as bad as it was before either.)

If I had to explain it, I'd say I don't feel angry or ecstatic in my everyday dealings with life.  I feel kind of numb...   In a fog.  If my short term memory wasn't getting better, I'd say I don't feel those things to any great extreme simply because I forgot what I was feeling great/awful about from one minute to the next.

Oh well...  It's not like I can do anything about it!

Today I went in to see the specialist 'job acquirer' that, together with the girl from the
'insurance company' and my 'occupational therapist, are going to find me a job.  Well, it is difficult because I don't know what I want to do, or what I can do!   I've still got 3.5 years left on my wage insurance but I figure maybe I should be getting into it for the social aspect, if nothing else!

I think my brain will swell to take in the extra things; but I'm not 100% sure.  So it's starting small with their knowledge of my ABI; which is where my 3 girls come in to it!

I feel a thousand today!  :(

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Thanks. Better check it out but it should be up today!