Happy Endings - Not

Today we are off to Geelong for a family BBQ to celebrate my dad’s birthday.  The Squeeze will be on ‘family overload’ which is what happens when you are a nancy that doesn’t drink, surrounded by loud, drinking, hilarious people.  At least we think we are witty.  Even better, he will only have a few days to get over it before we are back down there to stay at my sisters on the Saturday night and have a BBQ for Kid 3 to celebrate his birthday.

Overload all you like I say; because that might help him feel a little empathy for me; because this whole inundated with kids generally comes from his side.  And they all take after him; they are hard work; downright messy little piglets. 

Last week I called for a “kid free weekend”.  We had done my kid 3 for a week at trade school; followed by my brood for his V8 race driving day; followed by my kid 1 staying and he went home only in time for his kid 3 to land.  In other words, I was kidded out and wanted time off.

That was broken by the Harridan packing the kid off to us on Saturday after sport, where upon we had to drop him at her sisters across town before dinner (because we all know she has a bone in her leg and a scorpion in her wallet and sure as hell wasn’t driving and paying petrol to pick him up.)  She always words it coming from the kid, but it’s more like her wanting a couple of free hours of freedom to move into lesbianism/hippism.

Then I get a call from the Girl and she lands to stay.  Her beef headed boyfriend who I must admit I have never felt was good enough for her, proved beyond doubt that he wasn’t.  Her bouts of tears were broken up with my threatening to get my Louisville slugger and showing the worm what’s what; but in the end, I refrained.

I’ll admit that there is something about him that makes me fear for her.  So instead of me phoning and screaming at the weasel as I would like to, I will have to work out a way to get her stuff and cancel a holiday without antagonising him.  Then organise her to move back here and help her find a shared place to live.

Sigh.  Why can’t we meet someone, fall in love and just move onto the whole “happy ever after”?  Why does there always have to be drama?  Why do they have to be hurt?  And what do I do if she wants to roll over and go back to some pig who spat in her face..?

Oh well, now he is gone, there is room for Jimmy Bartel!