You don't have to read between the lines to hear my "Sorry. I'm washing my hair… or maybe rearranging my sock drawer."
In reality, getting up the Harridan's nose took second place to the fact that A: this is not 'our' weekend and B: the girl from my side is here while her life attempts to re-ravel and it will be a cold day in hell before I'll push her out the door early for the Harridan.
When he mentioned the "kid wants to stay this weekend…" I swear I could almost see his hair blow back in the wind that was my hasty - "No! Sorry. I have the girl here."
That was the short of it. The list of "you have got to be kidding's" were lengthy and even growing as I sit at the desk to blog.
Given that the hullabaloo of last weekend and my torture of the kid; my unrealistic, utterly astounding demands of asking him to use a knife and fork while eating still hadn't been sorted and I had already told the Squeeze without resolution, I wasn't prepared to up the ante on having the kid. (Even as I wrote that, the Squeeze interrupted me to mention that the Harridan can't drag her arse out of bed to have the kid at school early for his school camp, which means we have to have him 2 nights the weekend after next…)
My main arguments and the ones he has had a go at me about are: him packing clothes to bring, using basic table manners/hygiene, and his lack of consideration in time management. He can live like a pig while with the Harridan, I don't care; but I do care about my side of the world.
Those problems could be easily rectified if the kid chose to, yet each one has been met with argument and sarcasm, which I quite frankly, don't intend to put up with. Each time, the Squeeze took his side - even though both the Harridan and the kid's lack of consideration regarding time, drove him up the wall. As did her "you can never win" rule with the step kid.
And that the kid knows he has taken is side each time, means the little brat is getting worse. The argument and sarcasm over breakfast, followed by his obvious retarded attempt to fork bacon was in a word, childish bullshit and the Squeeze should have whacked him with the newspaper he was hiding behind.
When I spoke to him about the "the great bacon and egg torture", he implied that children didn't have to give respect unless earned. Ummm, in my world, I earn it because he is in my home. I cook, wash and clean up after him. That is how I earn my respect and without it, things between us will never work.
Perhaps when he is drawing his relationship circles with the nut doctor next time, he can ask how this can be the kid's home; how can this possibly be a home when I get a comment such as "rather than argue with him about using and knife and fork, you should come and discuss it with me..." Which I won't be doing. If he is in and a part of my home, I'll treat him the same as I would mine.
I involve him in everything regarding my children. He is involved, can have an opinion and inputs regularly - and it is most telling. They see him as my partner and treat him accordingly. He is on their facebooks, their phones and their gift list while shopping.
Please note: the same can not be said for even one of his.