This week I was forced to face the ugly truth. The Squeeze and I have both, somehow managed to slink right into a weird kind of spending frenzy.
I mean if you can find the time to sit and think about it, in between ebaying and tossing money at kids hand over fist, it’s pretty easy to see the black and white, unvarnished truth. One year ago, we were living in separate houses; paying rent, bills… living – and we were managing.
Now we have combined houses; we have basically managed to halve just about all outgoings; and yet our incomes would appear to go no further. In fact, I believe mine is shrinking!
So I decided to have the “budget discussion” with the Squeeze last night. I was on a roll really, because this slotted in right between “from here on in, I think we should set the dining table, turn off the television and put music on for all meals” and “I believe we need to discuss and document the “rules of the house”.
In fact, the house rules with the kid was originally his idea however, as is his want to do, it is a voiced idea that goes no further. As if just voicing the idea makes him an understanding hero type of guy, as opposed to the do-nothing kind of guy that he really is.
But the reality is that if we are to continue as a couple, then he is spot on. We need to formulate rules and sit the kid down on his next visit and put it on the table. This should work in several ways; relieve my stress levels that tend to go through the roof when faced with the mess/smell; lower the stress of the Squeeze who won’t have me telling him to tell the kid to put the apple core in the bin; or pick up the wet towel from the floor; and improve the kid’s hygiene level that will probably help him feel good about himself and maybe help him to acquire a few friends.
We agreed that we would have to discuss prior, but that it is important to let him know that he can do what he likes at mummy’s; but our house has certain rules and a level of hygiene that I’d like to maintain.
Then I moved in to “we need to do a budget”. I freely admit that I don’t think about it most of the time and I spend willy nilly without thought; but I’m not stupid; I can be ruthless when I want to be – and moving forward with the idea of buying a house, calls upon my ruthlessness.
Although the Squeeze thought the budget sounded like a plausible idea, I knew immediately that I’d have to create a calendar invite and put it in stone; and even then he will attempt to wheedle out of it. Although understands, in an abstract sort of way that it is a requirement, he doesn’t think he is a problem; in fact, he looked astounded when I mentioned that he spends money like he earns a lot more than he actually does.
At his quizzical look, I reminded him that he has a repeated habit of an inability to say no and not keeping his mouth shut. For example, his little suggestion the other weekend that if he found a cheap flat screen television, he would buy it for the kid was an absolute doosey. As I said last night, and if you buy a television for the Harridan’s house, you’d best keep the damned thing – you’d need it for your new place!!! Moron. Doesn’t he get that kids take the “off hand” remark as being in stone? The Kid didn’t hear “if I found a cheap flat screen...”; he heard “I’m getting you a flat screen!!!!”
Hell, he has probably already rearranged the lounge room!
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Thanks. Better check it out but it should be up today!