How easily it comes in the end...

I had several conversations with the Squeeze this weekend, but in the wash up, the whole issue is about me.  Wow.  There is a shock.

I sent the email to the witch telling her she was delusional.  It’s not about the witch saying that who lives in this house, uses my stuff, has nothing to do with me.  It’s not about the toad kid saying to me “you telling me to do something, is not a good enough reason for me to do it…”  It’s not even the fact that this vile person, purporting to be someone’s mother… would show him an email that basically said he was a toad that I didn't want in my house.  

As per usual, it's about me.  Seriously, you would think I would be used to it by now. 

How dare I defend myself - as he should have.  How dare I stick up for myself in the face of the toad king - as he should have. Nothing of course in any of these conversations about the fact that there is never any drama from my side; my ex's or my kids.

In fact at one point, he scoffed and said it's hardly the same thing. My youngest is 23. I pointed out that there was several communiques in last couple of weeks, including the scathing 'are you going to get kid 1 a father for his birthday...' Kid 1 is 29! But you guessed it; that's not the same thing. 

Every discussion ended the same way.  It is all about me.  If I didn’t read what she said, I wouldn’t get upset.

Great.  So in the end I decided that I don't need him or the drama that comes with the that horrible kid.  Nor the lesbian that still holds his testicles.  Seriously... I just don't need it.  I'm done.

All I can think of is that list of promises I received prior to giving up my home; going against my gut and moving so that we would have this horrible boy.

1.        No internet in the bedroom.  Didn’t happen.

2.       See a psychologist.  Didn’t happen.

3.        I intend to treat the kid as I would mine, since I’m raising him.  Meaning discipline.  Didn’t happen.

4.       I expect unfaltering support.  Didn’t happen.

5.       You have to shut that bitch down. I will not do 76 texts and emails a week.  Didn’t happen – in fact his idea of shutting her down is to delete her messages and the phone log.  Yeah.  Way to go moron.

6.       It has to be us against the world.  Didn’t happen.  Ha.  It is still them - against me.

I guess it all came to a head tonight when for the fourteenth time, I mentioned that he had to call the kid and tell him in no uncertain terms that if he thinks “you telling me to do something, is not a good enough reason for me to do it…” is life here - then don't come.  

Instead, when he finally went to call, he made such a song and dance that I shouldn't hear what he said, that I most certainly wanted to hear what he said.  He wanted to hide it so badly that I just knew, once again, it was going to be about me. Instead of giving this kid the set down he deserved, he was going to roll over. 

In the end, he walked down the street and I realised that this, whatever the hell it was, was over.

The first time this toad of a kid manipulated him or the ex wife had him jumping through hoops; it was over.  I'm just a slow learner.

Either way…. It’s done.  I’m already gone.    Now I just have to actually move. 

:(