Thursday, January 17, 2013

Wrong. Mistaken. Erroneous. Incorrect.

The night before last I went to plug my iPhone into the wall socket I have positioned in the pantry.  I have two around the house; mainly because if plugged it into the one on my bedside table while out in the kitchen, I’d never hear it.

So I take two steps into the pantry and realise it is gone.

I find this endlessly annoying; mainly because if you drag something out and don’t put it back, you waste time and energy in the ridiculous pursuit to find it.  Hell; just remembering where I had it last is difficult.  The Squeeze has often said “do you happen to know where ..?” and I walk straight to the item in question, pausing to expand upon the benefits of putting things back where you found them.

If I stretched my mind back, I remembered walking in the door the night before to find the kid in his usual position.  On the sofa, laptop on knee, phone in hand.  I noted that the phone was plugged in to the Squeeze’s laptop and without a doubt; this was my USB connection. 

So I angrily tell the Squeeze to find my damned wall socket to which he does the usual routine of “how do you know it wasn’t the ‘little princess’?”  Where upon I shout a bit, call him an idiot and say “the kid and I are the only two that have an iPhone!  The rest of you all have Samsungs!” and storm out of the room muttering loudly about people touching my damned stuff and from here on in, I was putting stuff where it couldn’t be found!

The next day, I received a text from the Squeeze telling me that my daughter had the wall socket.  Actually, he said “your little princess has it” in an attempt to sound as scathing as I can be when discussing the kid doing something annoying.  He can never quite pull it off…

Last night, he mentioned that I never blog about being in the wrong; and he is right. 

Then again, he doesn’t take into account several things:
  1. The blog is mine.  It’s about the dumb arsed things he does; which includes his Moodleness and ridiculous kid antics. 
  2. The Kid was by no means totally innocent!  He took the connection, used it and left it lying on the damned sofa where it would disappear behind a cushion and be lost forever!
  3. The blog is mine.  I rule it.  I can write what I like.

Okay Squeeze; for the sake of peace... 
I was wrong.  Your little precious darling didn’t take the connection.


  1. About time the poor guy caught a break.

  2. I'm almost certain, Mr. Anonymous, that every person on the planet knows that you are in fact, the Squeeze...


Thanks. Better check it out but it should be up today!