Acquiesce!! To comply/agree passively...

I always end up acquiesce to the Squeezes hair brained schemes. I comply. Consent. Submit. Yield. Why do I do that! What makes it somehow worse, is he doesn't follow through so I end up feeling disappointed in some way! Stupid really, when you consider it wasn't what I wanted in the first place!

Years ago, I slid off the rails for a moment in time and went out with total dick.  Actually, he was a private eye, so dick by occupation, dick by nature; and let’s face it; you have to have a ‘creepy stalker’ gene to get such a gig.

I went to therapy during the five years we dated because I needed to find the root cause...   He really didn’t feature in my sessions as anything other than a shadowy representation of my love life to that point.  It wasn’t about him, or those before him.  It was about me.  I needed to understand what was inside me that kept dragging me back into unhealthy relationships.

Did I find the answer?  Not really.  I felt like I had come to an understanding; maybe.  In the end, what did that knowledge change?  Contrary to popular belief, you don’t suddenly discover the cause and from that moment on, you’re just skipping down the path of life, carefree and laughing. Well, if it is like that, it sure as hell wasn't for me!

No. I'm not about to end it all. I tell that story to set the scene. To explain what I'm like!

It is the evolution of care.

You meet someone and so begins the evolution.  “Friendship” moves into “hot”; “hot” morphs into a warmer “love”.  That “love” means you “care” a great deal about that person.  You want them to be happy; you go out of your way to ensure that happiness!  If they are not absolutely blissful, then you’re in serious trouble.  The relationship is floundering!

And therein lies my problem.  I evolved.  I morphed.  The Squeeze is still in the bloody same place. After years and years!